Hello, dear readers! I hope this post finds you well.

Today, I'm going to be discussing the distinct and very important separation between self-love and romantic love. I am very passionate about this particular topic and find it crucial to talk about.

Should self-love stem from romantic love? The short answer is: no. The long answer is as follows:

Self-love (emphasis on the word self) should come from within. That's sort of the whole point. 

I will say this once and I will say it again: you DO NOT need a significant other to love you in order to love yourself. You ABSOLUTELY need to learn to love yourself outside of romantic love. This is VITAL INFO, people. VITAL.

And if you DO happen to be in a relationship? Great! But your self-love shouldn't come from that. There are no exceptions to this rule.

You don't need a special someone to tell you that you are radiant and beautiful and inspiring and confident and compassionate and full of love and laughter and warmth. You should learn to become and believe those things all on your own! That's what self-love is!!!

Of course, romantic partners are wonderful in their own right. I love my boyfriend, Nathan, very much, and he loves me the same. But my love for myself doesn't stem from our relationship. It comes from within me (as it should!). And the best part is, he loves himself, too! Because of this, we have no problem loving each other. We are very happy together. (Okay, now I'm just gloating. Moving on.)

This brings up another point: the idea that romantic relationships are actually healthier and more likely to succeed in the long term when both parties love themselves. 

It is quite difficult to believe another person loves you if you don't love yourself first. This can lead to feelings of doubt, confusion, and more self-hatred. "If I don't even like myself, how can another person possibly love me???" is a common thought among self-doubters.

This mindset is a recipe for disaster and often leads relationships to crumble. Not good.

Embedded here is a YouTube video by The School of Life detailing this concept of a lack of self-love negatively affecting relationships.



Clearly, self-love is an important and mature first step in the world of romantic love. It makes relationships easier, healthier, and more fulfilling. 

If you take away only one thing from this post, let it be this: self-love comes first. Romantic love comes second.

My dear readers, if you happen to be single, I encourage you to treat yourself this evening and take a hot bath and eat an entire cake and watch your favorite movie and read a good book and pet a dog. Indulge in your self-love. You deserve it!

If you happen to be in a relationship like myself? Do the same thing. Invite your special someone to join you. Ask them if they love themselves. If not, perhaps direct them to my blog. (Shameless plug.)

A website I love is called "Tiny Buddha". They offer lots of inspiring wisdom. They have an article addressing this issue as well: http://tinybuddha.com/blog/why-self-love-is-the-key-to-finding-true-love/ It's worth reading!

Love yourself, and surround yourself with people who love themselves (and you!), too. 

You are deserving of love from all angles.

Take care.

BB